Movie Renter's Guide

Current Movies - Part 27 - August, 1997

Staff

Ratings:
		Extraordinary
		Good
		Acceptable
		Mediocre
		Poor

"The Relic", Paramount Pictures, 1996, Color, Filmed in Panavision and presented at measured aspect ratio (laserdisc) 2.27:1, Surround Sound, AC-3, 1 Hr 50 min, Rated R; Penelope Ann Miller, Tom Sizemore, Linda Hunt, James Whitmore; Anthropologist John Whitney sends several boxes to the Chicago Museum of Natural History, from his digs in Brazil, but their contents are not so natural. Inside are some leaves containing large amounts of growth hormone, and an ancient relic. Soon, the museum has an ancient devil crawling and leaping about, killing visitors by decapitating them. Naturalist, Margot Green (Miller) and some policemen try to kill the "thing" before it kills them. In the meantime, the opening night gala for a Superstition Exhibit is scheduled, and the Mayor isn't going to let a few murders get in the way. The film is nothing more than a poor script that tenuously threads the digital effects, and no well known pundits of reviews on TV can save it. - JEJ -

Entertainment:
Video Quality:
Audio:
Photography:
Violence:	grisly, explicit decapitations
Sex:	no
Language:	the "F" and "S" words

"Metro", Caravan Pictures, 1996, Color, Filmed in Panavision and presented at measured aspect ratio (laserdisc) 2.29:1, Surround Sound, AC-3, 1 Hr 57 min, Rated R; Eddie Murphy, Michael Rapaport; Scott Roper (Murphy) is a police negotiator, which is a person who goes into a crime situation where there are hostages, and negotiates with the perpetrators. He shoots only if he has to, and after confronting a psycho, Roper finds he has to. The action is great, and the movie runs right along, but only in spite of Murphy, not because of him. The jacket says, "Murphy is funnier than ever," but this is no comedy, and Murphy seems out of place. The only thing in the film worth watching is the excellent car chase through downtown San Francisco. - JEJ -

Entertainment:
Video Quality:
Audio:
Photography:
Violence:	explicit
Sex:	no
Language:	the "F" and "S" words

"Jungle 2 Jungle", Walt Disney, 1997, Color, Filmed spherically and presented at measured aspect ratio (laserdisc) 1.76:1, Surround Sound, AC-3, 1 Hr 45 min, Rated PG; Tim Allen, Martin Short; Michael Cromwell (Allen) is a Wall Street investment broker who must travel to Venezuela to have his wife sign some divorce papers so he can marry someone else. When he arrives, he finds that he has a 13 year old son that his wife never told him about (she left him after one year of marriage because he was never home, although apparently he must have been home at least once). He takes his son, Mimi Siku, back to New York for a visit, where Mimi promptly tries to eat the cat and mark his territory on a house plant. A pet spider drives Mike's fiancee crazy, and his partner (Short) makes a shady deal with the Russian Mafia using some coffee certificates. The film is typical Disney, lots of fun and silliness. A family movie. - JEJ -

Entertainment:
Video Quality:
Audio:
Photography:
Violence:	fist fights
Sex:	no
Language:	no

"Private Parts", Paramount Pictures, 1997, Color, Filmed spherically and presented at measured aspect ratio (laserdisc) 1.76:1, Surround Sound, AC-3, 1 Hr 48 min, Rated R; Howard Stern, Robin Quivers, Mary McCormack; Howard Stern is the king of shock radio, and this is his story of how he got there. From Boston University, to Detroit, to Washington, D.C., and finally, New York City, Howard brings new vitality and vulgarity, life and lust, to dull radio broadcasts. Unfortunately, the radio management and the FCC were not ready. It was a big surprise to everyone but Howard that he ended up in the # 1 rating. The film is actually quite funny, but you need to dig out your most basic sense of humor to enjoy the scatology. - JEJ -

Entertainment:
Video Quality:
Audio:
Photography:
Violence:	no
Sex:	frontal nudity
Language:	the "F" and "S" words, and then some

"Murder at 1600", Warner Brothers, 1997, Color, Filmed spherically and presented at measured aspect ratio (DVD) 1.73:1, Surround Sound, AC-3, 1 Hr 48 min, Rated R; Wesley Snipes, Diane Lane, Alan Alda; When a young woman is murdered at the White House, Washington, D.C. Detective Harlan Regis (Snipes) considers the crime in his jurisdiction, but the Secret Service does not. One of the Service Agents (Lane) is at first reluctant to help Harlan, but when a conspiracy to implicate the President's son emerges, she decides to help him find out who is the real perpetrator. The rapid fire action and non-stop suspense kept me on the edge of my seat until the very last moment, and I mean very last. It is one of the best "who done it" movies I have seen in many, many years. - JEJ -

Entertainment:
Video Quality:
Audio:	(The AC-3 is fantastic!)
Photography:
Violence:	extreme
Sex:	explicit
Language:	surprisingly, and refreshingly, no

� Copyright 1997 Secrets of Home Theater & High Fidelity
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